The change of a new year haven't affected me much but deep down I know that I lost a couple of people. Some people stay but they seem far away, some further with just a little left for me reminisce. More than a couple of times, I wish that I would forgo my pride with that little courage and to stop struggling with the meaningless assumptions to the answers. I wish I would pick up my phone and wished the other parties had waiting on the other line.
Things changed and people changed. I'm not who I am 1 year back,1 month back or maybe I have changed to think that I do not have to be. Priority changes and undeniably I give up on things/people I feel less comfortable with. Friendship in my university life is build on a base of formality and compliments instead of laughter and the exchange of insults. It sucks when I sit here, reflecting on this reality that I should have change many months back.
To express my train of thoughts to a certain someone, to arrange dates with many I have missed and to start insulting people before making friends with them.
Typing all these string of words have also made me realised a more than a handful of friends whom I had grown closer to and the ones whom I can act like a bitch in front of.
Not to forget my companion of nearly a year, whom stayed by me to replace all my insecurities and lonely days. It's been such a pleasant journey with him.
I know many people like to assume that a girl needs no one but their boyfriend but I really beg to differ. I don't want to have guy friends only when I lose my partner because that's totally cynical.
So before another year passes by in a blink of an eye,
I wish to add another resolution to my list of three.


